This~n~That... Oral Surgeon, MY office Journey Health Care, and the Weekend

I waited a few weeks for this appointment, Luckily i did not have another Flare up before I was seen.  I had approx 9 flare ups since COVID began and i couldn't be seen until recently.    I am having issues with my two wisdom teeth on the right.   the bottom is growing into the nerve that runs in my lower jaw.  and the upper never broke through,  but according to the Surgeon,  He will not touch that one unless the benefit of the Surgery out weights the issues this tooth may cause.   it is very close to the facial nerve  but has already grown into the sinus cavity.   I will have the bottom wisdom tooth extracted  on June 22.  

I trust these Surgeons,  and it was this actual practice that took care of my Son Andrews major jaw surgery 12 years ago,..  and they did an amazing job.

I am so proud to work for the company that I do.   JADE Wellness/ Journey Health Care.   As the people in this world seem to be getting more unbalanced and scared.   My job has become more ummm overwhelming too.   but i work at a place,  where i can be honest how i am feeling...... and immediately finding solutions is on the priority list.   and the ending of the week was much improved.   almost 2 years ago on June 17  I left  S'eclairer as Dr Chaudhary had retired and moved on.  I had Faith that I would end up exactly where He wanted me to be.   And today...... I couldn't imagine working for anyone else.  and i've said it before, my co-workers are my "work-kids"?  yes most of them are my kids age...... and the few of Us that are "older" are my sisters..........  and I am blessed beyond belief............ 

This weekend I am working in my Nanny position,  yes I am 54 and still babysit......  I have been babysitting for 42 years......... talk about feeling old.    I missed them so much during COVID lockdown, I am so excited to be seeing them so much this next month or two.... so no complaints there.

Take time to enjoy the moments, and God Bless Us All

Is it a mid-life Crisis? or ummm something else?

and it went like this today,  Katie talking to a coworker,  "  Hey just letting you know that I will be going with my mom,   She is in a midlife crisis and just bought a camper".   But let me explain, several months ago I started looking at campers, I saw these tiny things, but started thinking "bigger" but loving my Subaru..  I new I didn't want to stress her out and wanted to keep the weight well below what she can pull.    And then i kept thinking I want a camper with two separate sleep spaces, I wanted the bathroom inside, I want the kitchen inside........ and before i knew it, I was looking at big vehicles  ....... and then it got to be too much. after realizing I am scared to pull my bike rack at 

times, I wasn't sure what I was thinking.  and I stopped looking..... fast forward to last weekend and spending time in my friend Beth's tiny camper, I fell in love with such a tiny cozy teardrop.  Coming home Sunday, I thought more and more about How much I need to get away and recharge my Spirit.   My work is intense and never ending,  being a nurse in Psychiatry and Addictions is never easy...... but i can tell for the first time in 27 years, I noticed that I am feeling overwhelmed.  because seriously i could work 24 hours, the calls and issues never stop.   I NEVER doing anything just for me.... so with this being said,  I emailed a dealer of this camper,  and he was going to set up an appointment to see it this week,   and then it hit me I knew this is exactly what I wanted,  IT is brand new. and i didn't need to see it.... i emailed the dealer again........ and said I am just going to take it.  He said that he would have a salesman contact me in the AM.....  I pull into the office at 958 am,  he calls right then,  I put down a 500.00 deposit.. and went today to sign the papers........   I will be getting my subaru ready to pull it,   Christina's son will bring it back for me ........BUT it is mine....  I wish i can even put my excitement into words......  I have no idea how to tow....... my Car isn't ready for that,   maybe i am doing this backwards.... I don't care, I may not have faith in Me, i am a little scared to learn... But I have FAith in Faith, and i know i need this.

NOW i need your help,  I am going to take the Bushwacker symbols off ............ and I want to name her.......  some thoughts are   The birds nest,  the burrow,  The Pelican,......  if you can give me ideas for a name for  such a tiny paradise  i would appreciate your input.....    When the name is decided , we will decorate her..........and i will post the name chosen on my blog with photos of her new graphics.... PS Katie did name her Sally 

Please be blessed,......... and live life like tomorrow will not come........ go for it!! blessing to you all 

         

 

Off the grid for a few days!! Diabetic friendly

 This Thursday I headed up to Cooks Forest State park with my friend Beth,  Her Husband was going to bring the regular camper up and hook it up.  ( he didn't think we could handle it) He ended up having a project at home and could not....... Didn't stop us, she had a tiny camper, and a tent.  I used this cute little sleep camper that I fell in Love with.....  and I want one,   I want to be able to get away and not rely on anyone..... my Subaru could pull this.. I may make that work.   Thursday before i left, I worked from home,  I wanted to leave at 1pm,  but didn't get away until 3.  the request and messages for the nurse just never stopped.  I finally just had to STOP.   and this is why I need to go off the grid every so often.   If i could pick what my absolute favorite thing in the world to do..... it would be camping at a state park.  more rugged of a site the better.   This is where my Church is, this is where i feel at home.    A few people asked me how i could even make a camping trip Keto/Diabetic friendly.... and I smiled, because honestly it was quite easy.   To begin with the exercise for the mind, and the healing of the soul, begins with Nature listening to the trees dance,  and the smell of a wood fire, the sounds of the frogs at night.  and the songs of the birds waking just before Sunrise.   NO TV, no radio, no phone.  But the loud sound of Silence at times.   and then there was the exercise for the body, the walking, the hiking the wading in the stream (yes barefoot)  The Diet was easy too  i only drank water and sparkling water (waterloo my favorite).  and coffee in the morning, and a tea once in a while.  one meal we did a pot roast over the open fire,  with onions and veggies.   breakfast was easy a veggie and cheese omelet with bacon.  snacks i would eat a handful of pork rinds, or nuts, or cheese and meat.  Beth did bring chocolate cake, and cinnamon breakfast rolls.   I did not have even a bite....... and i was fine with that.   my "treat" was a baked potato wrapped in foil and placed in the hot ambers of the fire pit.  with plenty of butter and sour cream.   I was so busy exploring, we only ate two meals.  so there was that!!!     oh i also made a chicken, mushroom, and broccoli alfredo for a meal  ( i will post a photo of that)    I have a very busy couple of weeks as i will be working but also "babysitting" next week.  so i needed my emotional battery recharged.    Please take time to take care of you.  And God bless Us all.

   

 

It's a hit or miss, but i keep trying !!!!

I am always trying new Keto/ diebetic friendly recipes.  I have to keep from getting bored with the same foods.  In this photo the Air Fried Garlic Parmesan and Butter Wings a BIG hit.  the keto pound cake that I tossed into the garbage a big Miss.   I am having a tough time finding really good wings up here in Indiana, they aren't cooked or crispy enough.   I find if i soak my wings in cold vinegar water for a couple hours, and then rinse and pat dry,  i put on a flat dinner plate, various herbs....  i usually use a little garlic powder, parsley, adobe seasoning, pepper, paprika  and mix this with a table spoon of baking powder.....  (this is what gives the crispiness on the wing)  i place the seasoned wings into my air fryer in a single layer on parchment paper,  and bake 400 degrees for 10 minutes,  turn each wing and then bake another 5 minutes, and I will do this until they are crisp ........ I already have a small pan on the stove with melted butter,  fresh finely chopped garlic and some parsley  ready to pour over the wings as soon as i get them out of the fryer...  i toss and coat well, and then sprinkle my parmesan at the end.......   I make my own blue cheese dressing dip......  this is one of my favorite things to do in my air fryer.,   The other favorite use of my Air fryer is doing my burgers...... i have so many ways to do them.......I have practiced so much, that i get them perfect everytime....... it took adjusting time and temp and there were several misses before the hits !!!!   

Today i am making a Keto Chipotle Meatloaf,  can't wait to see how this turns out .  And i think i am going to make a  Gingerbread pound cake to use with my Lemon Curd  (its assumed that in my blog everything is Keto and Diabetic Friendly)  i tried the Lemon Curd with my Coconut cupcakes last week, and it was definitely a Hit.   Even if it is diabetic friendly and Keto,  I do not eat my sweets all the time,   when i make them.........  i individually wrap them in Glad Wrap Press and seal,  and then i put each wrapped dessert into a large freezer bag.....  and then I am able to only take one as i want it.

Hard to believe i have been living this life style since August 25th 2020.  Time flies when you're having fun I guess.    Hope you have a peaceful and blessed week.

listening to that "inner voice"

 I took this photo at 6 this morning,  Dandelion, my favorite flower!!!!  This has been a very emotionally charged week for me, and this is why i really need to stay grounded and take care of myself,   I have been asked by someone to share a recent story here on my blog,   And i have really taking time to think about this, I know my blog titled the Diabetic Pelican, is supposed to be about eating, and exercising right??  But it is so much more than that,   I am not religious at all,  BUT  I am Spiritual, and I trust in my Journey and I trust I am always where i am supposed to be.  and I am very aware of that.....  so this is for you my friend, (you know who you are)......  I want to share this.

Monday was a very crazy day at work,  Our patients seem to be a little more anxious, a little more hopeless, and yes some a little more grumpy.   I had more than normal amount of Crisis calls that day,   it breaks my heart to talk with a 22 year old young lady....... who was so broken and so hopeless, she just didn't want to live anymore.   Or the patient that couldn't get her anxiety medication, and hearing the fear and panic in her voice.  So it was like that all day.  At 6:55 pm   ( our office leaves at 7pm) the secretary pops into my office, one of the patients that i actually see, his mom was calling in to see about scheduling him an appointment with me,      I didn't think anything about it,  he is very sweet,  and does very well (very intelligent but not great with social skills)  so 99% of the time I say.... sure schedule them to see me this week.........BUT and this is where the inner voice comes in,  I had an incredible desire to talk to this mom and her son.... so i had the call transferred.   The young man had to come in the evening as he couldn't miss work at his new job.  I work monday evenings.   Tuesday is my one day i want to be off  without thinking about the office at all.  (weekends i always keep an eye out for Crisis with our patients).    I don't know how, or why,  but I knew I HAD to see him.   so i scheduled him to see me the next day, a Tuesday in the evening.  I just decided i would go into the office this day. besides, i had overflow from such a busy Monday.  unsure why i made that call,  but didn't question it,  It was just a feeling.  Tuesday he came in to see me,  and although i don't use a name, i am going to respect and give privacy to this incredible loving family and not share the details of what happened after that.  But i will say..... He and his family are doing exactly what they need to do.   The charge of energy and gratitude that I had driving home from work that night,  overwhelmed me and I cried most of the way home.  looking back,  nothing happens by accident.  I believe i was where i should have been at the exact time.  whether it was my gut, or divine intervention...........maybe they are the same, gut feeling/divine intervention!!!   as I was driving and crying........... this quiet voice from within softly spoke to my heart..... was it the boys guardian angel,  was it mine?   not sure.  But the next available evening i would have worked would have been the next Monday... and in my heart , i knew,  I knew this sweet young man would not have been here if we would have waited......  the magnification of that had me so overwhelmed that i was unable to sleep that night......  And i am so blessed, so blessed that i am at the place and age in my life that i listen to that soft voice that we all hear but don't always listen too. In closing if you pray,  pray, if you believe in energy and vibes, send energy.... lift humanity in your thoughts....  People are so scared and broken.........substance abuse is everywhere........ just people trying to numb the fear and the pain.   And Suicide is real,  people are so broken they just don't see the way out.   This is why i always say be Kind to one another,   without judgement.  some of the greatest people i know, are not politicians, ministers, and the "popular" ..........  They are , the broken souls, the addicts in recovery who sometimes fall, they are real and honest and beautiful.  Many of my patients are my GREATEST HEROS, and i've been saying that for years.   I am so humbled and blessed that God has chosen my path to be surrounded by these beautiful people...... they have taught me more than any professor or religious leader ever did.  I am full of gratitude.  

KETO CAKE, ...... ACCOUNTABILITY....... and RESET!!!

I had a really mellow and beautiful few days,   Just how I wanted it. I spent Sat evening with the kids for dinner.  and I spent yesterday at the office with as i call them my "work family".   It was one of those Mondays that makes me think i want to retire early,  I have been in Psychiatry and Addictions for 25 ish years,   and i truly don't remember people struggling so hard, it just goes to show you that humans are not made for isolation,  and it has hit people hard.  More anxiety, more depression, more addictions   More hopelessness,   Children and Teens and Young adults that don't feel like life is worth living...  I can usually stay upbeat, but yesterday when i got home after 9pm,  I felt like my Soul ran a marathon....   i do not usually work Tuesdays, but today i came into the office,  One to see a young patient in person and Two work on the overflow from yesterday.    My like forever Friend Christina took the time to make me a Keto cake,  it was delicious, she 

even made it with Swerve,  which is all that I use for my desserts.  ( she herself doesn't use it).  the cake had 3 layers, and a raspberry gel layered with fresh raspberries, strawberries and a few blue berries,  the cake was so thoughtful. and my coworkers enjoyed it also.   Christina is more like a sister to me,   a  pain in the ass, we've been irritated with each other, busy in different aspects of our lives at times....BUT we are ALWAYS there for each other and we are going on like 35 years .... oh she's still a big pain though....  

The other drawing is from this very precious soul of a man Frank,  I will never meet him on earth as he was a part of a diet computer group from almost 20 years ago,   but he is just one of those people you just know is a beautiful soul on earth.. and he does these really cute drawings and he grabs the essence of the subject he is drawing ...... and he got me down to a T yet again........ 

Okay enough of the birthday stuff,   I promised myself, my brother Chris, and the people that read my blog that i will always be honest, always remember this isn't a sprint but a marathon and the finish line doesn't happen until death.   I need to be accountable for everything i do , it is so easy for us humans to slowly add a bite of cheese or a nut or two during "fasting" time,   or grabbing a breaded onion ring or a an extra serving of mashed potato (my favorite food)   or sometimes even eating too much of the allowed food.........  and i feel this is happening to me.   and sometimes i may not even be paying attention,  and it's just a mindless reflex.    So today I reset.... my watch is set again to go off at 10 am when i allow myself to break my fast.  and then it is set to go off again at 6 pm when i start my Fast.  I have my 1/2 gallon water jug that i fill every morning, and must drink it all before bed,   (yes sometimes i am finishing it at 8 in the evening..... and yes i am peeing half the night )  and the hardest thing i am trying to do is incorporate the set exercise...........  i have to figure that one out yet..... i am finding i am just too busy......but there is no excuse for my own health........ i'll get it though......... i know i will.

Please have a good day and please please please be kind to one another,  the world needs more kindness and love spread around.  Blessings 

MY DAY/WEEKEND

Yesterday  the boys met me over at Katie's for my Mother's day/birthday dinner together.   it was just the four of Us,  and honestly I liked it that way. I decided on pasta,  as that is something I cannot do on Keto/Low Carb.  and instead of getting my own dessert,   we got one dessert and shared.  lets see.... I am trying to think about what I ate during my one free hour,  I had a handful of chips with some dip,  I had  two pieces of chocolate out of Katie's Easter basket....... I ate 1/2 of my spinach filled manicotti  and had maybe 4 or 5 bites of chocolate mouse cheese cake, and that was It !!! there was no "cheating" or no falling off the wagon,  there was no guilt before or after..   AND THIS IS WHAT IS DIFFERENT THIS TIME AROUND.  It is so freeing to not be on a diet any more......  yes I eat Keto/Low Carb.  but i don't consider it a diet,   it is just a way of living for me.  My blood sugar level was normal yesterday before i went to bed, and it was normal fasting this morning,  I have no desire to eat an other "anything hour" today or tomorrow.  and actually i have more of an incentive to do my two week strick Keto....... which i throw in every few months.  I am also planning on making a keto enchilada casserole type  of dish,  a vanilla pound cake and Lemon Curd.  of course all Keto friendly and of course sugar free...... already planning my food for the day tomorrow since i will be at work for both meals and one snack.  Mondays are my long day..... 

I wish all mom figures a happy day today and everyday...... I sure miss my Mom,  but i know she is proud of her kids still home here on earth.

Have a Blessed day today,   Happiness is a choice......... so choose Happy!!!

 

Patience...... in a lifetime and not in a minute

 It today's world we want results now, we want answers now, we want it all done now!!!  Well it doesn't happen that way.  Today I had my second appointment for my tooth/jaw pain.  last week there was too much swelling and too much pain to manipulate my mouth and do a proper examination.  A week on antibiotics and one week later,   and we are leaning toward the wisdom tooth,  it has "grown" directly into my nerve that runs along my jaw line and up to my ear and beyond...... (hence why I could not pin point the pain, as it throbs into my entire half of face)  This tooth needs to come out, I have another Wisdom tooth on the top right side that is way up there, never descended but is very close to the nerve also...   the bottom one definitely needs removed .  he didn't find any cavities or issues that way, and the dentist feels that we need this taken care of first.   I agree.  I called the oral surgeon immediately when I got home, and the first appointment is May 27th.  I took it.  if i don't agitate my jaw I am okay,  but like after my appointment, the pain is throbbing and just damn annoying.   it also hurts if I move my jaw too much (the lower wisdom tooth almost doesn't fit and is very close to my mandible joint) so too much talking, and when I eat causes discomfort..... BUT it is doable.   This started 15 months ago when COVID happened.  so if I waited 15 months,  I can certainly wait 20 days for the evaluation and then determine a date for the surgery.

In other news,  I am still really enjoying cooking and baking Keto style now.  My son stopped in yesterday for my Keto Pizza and sugar free keto brownies...... he said he can't even tell they are keto and he loves them.  I made a lasagna recipe the other day using Zucchini,  I made a white cream sauce using butter, heavy cream, onions, roasted garlic, and xanthan gum  and a filling using ricotta cheese, mozzarella cheese, garlic powder, spinach, mushrooms, and spices...... layered all the above 3 times..... and baked it in my air fryer ............ so delicious.

Sunday is mother's day, and Monday is my birthday,  my kids are taking me to dinner on Saturday.  I will make sure I do my intermittent fasting,  I will make sure that I drink all of my water, and I will make sure I will eat light the one other meal........BUT for my meal with the kids I will eat what ever I want,  that doesn't mean I will eat everything until I burst........ it means I will eat slowly and until I am full.....  I am not sure if I will have a dessert or not, as I love things I make with my Swerve sweetener, so I can honestly say that I am not missing anything.

I am hoping I can get out on the bike tomorrow or sunday too.......  i love to bike more that I love walking..... (just sayin')   Please choose to have a peaceful weekend.... and may you be blessed

EARTHING.....exercise for the soul :)

Yesterday i spent the majority of my afternoon at Katie's, Puppy sitting.  Katie moved into this home two years ago, and it is truly one of my favorite homes ever,  I love her fenced in yard.  she is surrounded by very old trees, and the ground although flat, has the roots of the trees, layers of soft dark moss, little tiny purple flowers, and cool dark soil.  Many may think her yard isn't perfectly manicured ....... I think it is perfectly imperfect.

The sky was so blue, the wind really active and the earth so soft and cool,  I love being barefoot,  you will find me barefoot in the soft snow, in the dew of a spring morning, in the deep woods or the rumbling stream.   I wonder if there is a specific time, or a gradual forgetfulness of the wonder of Childhood.. when do we stop playing in the rain, rolling down a hill covered in dandelions, and climbing a tree?? When does the veil of adulthood cover the soul  stopping us from seeing the beauty of  life, God and love????

I truly feel there is energy in the earth, and i truly believe in the healing with nature, and the transfer of Earths energy to me.  and no matter what i am feeling, a barefoot walk always seems to balance me and make things right.

This middle age menopause thing is really cool.  I have never felt freer than I do now.  I remember a couple years ago, when my marriage was ending, my job as I know it (S'eclairer for 13 years)was closing, and my physical  possessions and my home lost to a fire  all with in 3 months.   I would have never dreamed I would be where i am today,  I just Trusted that there was a divine plan for me, and I trusted I was going exactly to where I was to be.   I never thought i wouldn't go through shit... i just knew that I wasn't going through it alone.  Today I am looking for my very own home,  Today I have a job that I absolutely Love and am so proud to be a part of  (thank you Journey Health Care)  and my X husband and I get along absolutely fine,  I went straight from my mom and dad, to my First husband and father to my three kids, to my kids, to my second Marriage.  I never experienced me,    Now my kids are grown and I do like being single, maybe not forever,  but for now. 

Now update on my right sided jaw pain,  I am on antibiotics, it is easing some of the inflammation, and i will be going back to the dentist on        Tuesday to formulate an actual diagnosis and plan  My blood sugars are back to 90-100  I am still eating without issues and sticking to my plan. the exercise thing i still have to conquer,  I am still trying new Keto/Low carb recipes,  and still drinking at least 1/2 gallon of plain water a day

the photos are all in Katie's yard, it shows me standing among moss, rocks and roots,  the little tiny purple flower close up, looking up into the sky and the view of her privacy fence

Make a choice to have a good week...... and may blessings be with all of you